I am all for judging people by the present.... by what I see and not what I have heard in heresay.
BUT... there is this woman out there named Lorena Bobbitt. Now I understand this is an extreme and almost too obvious compared to points I usually like to make....
BUT... she did something really awful. Since it made international news, of COURSE you wouldn't date/marry/sit-in-the-same-room-with her.
BUT... what if it did not make any news what-so-ever? What if you met her somewhere and she seemed nice. You hook up and she has this 'ghost in her closet'. Look for yourself, it's right there next to the hacksaw, the industrial scizzors (hey RWS :D ) , the tweezers (hey Cloud :huh: ) , and the lightsabre.
NOW... I am not saying that we need a car-fax type service to keep tabs on why people are divorced so we can look it up later, but I think it's safe to say we would ALL like to know that our potential bride/groom hasn't mutilated their previous mates.
NOW to bring it back to normality... Western belief on marriage says that it is for EVER. Something did go wrong in a divorcee's marriage ((NOT necessarily having ANYTHING with faults in that person)). So a new possible mate has to wonder what it was that did not pan out. It is only natural and defensive curiosity, not some insecure invasion of privacy.
I made it clear in my example post that I would in fact have dated and who knows, married this girl from college. So I certainly not taken her from the pool JUST for having a divorce in her past. Looking at my parents, too: I would say my dad is quite un-marryable to any woman where my mom is now veeery happily married once again. If my step-dad would have held my mom's divorce against her, he would have suffered a tremendous loss!!
Just some thoughts for ya'
Beastie
BUT... there is this woman out there named Lorena Bobbitt. Now I understand this is an extreme and almost too obvious compared to points I usually like to make....
BUT... she did something really awful. Since it made international news, of COURSE you wouldn't date/marry/sit-in-the-same-room-with her.
BUT... what if it did not make any news what-so-ever? What if you met her somewhere and she seemed nice. You hook up and she has this 'ghost in her closet'. Look for yourself, it's right there next to the hacksaw, the industrial scizzors (hey RWS :D ) , the tweezers (hey Cloud :huh: ) , and the lightsabre.
NOW... I am not saying that we need a car-fax type service to keep tabs on why people are divorced so we can look it up later, but I think it's safe to say we would ALL like to know that our potential bride/groom hasn't mutilated their previous mates.
NOW to bring it back to normality... Western belief on marriage says that it is for EVER. Something did go wrong in a divorcee's marriage ((NOT necessarily having ANYTHING with faults in that person)). So a new possible mate has to wonder what it was that did not pan out. It is only natural and defensive curiosity, not some insecure invasion of privacy.
I made it clear in my example post that I would in fact have dated and who knows, married this girl from college. So I certainly not taken her from the pool JUST for having a divorce in her past. Looking at my parents, too: I would say my dad is quite un-marryable to any woman where my mom is now veeery happily married once again. If my step-dad would have held my mom's divorce against her, he would have suffered a tremendous loss!!
Just some thoughts for ya'
Beastie