05-27-2003, 08:03 PM
1. Cheating is getting with another person romantically or physically. Even kissing, as small as it may seem, is cheating. Think about it this way... if your partner is just kissing someone else, it is almost as if they are courting eachother... they're not just seeking some physical pleasure and something new, they are emotionally into it. So in some ways, seeing someone else and not just screwing around is worse than a one-night stand. But back to the point... I see it all as cheating anyway. Porn and masturbation isn't cheating... but even like an internet relationship is, it's just the principle of it. I would not feel good if my girlfriend somehow needed someone else, whether it was in person or physical or whatnot.
2. This is tough, I won't answer it. There are shades of gray. It depends on age and how close you are to eachother in a relationship. So let's say it's early, there are rocky times, that kind of stuff. That's possible to get over. If it's a close relationship, and there is cheating, particularly romantic cheating, then I say it's over. You can't do that stuff. Marriage... I suppose with counseling and stuff, anything is possible to get over for the sake of salvaging what normally is a good marriage. If the marriage sucked anyway, it should be over. I know I'm making statements like it should be set in stone, but I'm just saying my personal thoughts about how I'd feel in the situation, or what I think might be best. I personally think infidelity is just straight up wrong, and I myself wouldn't tolerate it. I wouldn't do it either, guys may be horny, but there is plenty of self control. I think I feel this way mostly because I cheated with my friend's girlfriend when I was 14... he's no longer a friend, she is a nutcase that I should have never gotten involved with in the first place, and that's sorta put things into perspective. And for guys... I don't necessarily think once a cheater, always a cheater. Though there is self control, sometimes hormones can get the better of a weak man. But the experience can make him stronger and change his ways. Then again, some guys are completely habitual and don't even care (they are known as dickheads). Women, it's kinda hard to tell. I'd say because it's more rare for a woman to cheat, that one that does is probably habitual. Then again, if there is a guy who is really charming and comforting, and her boyfriend or whatever has been an a-hole recently, it can be a one time thing.
3. Once again, shades of gray. But I'd say 90% of the time, bad idea to go out with someone in a serious relationship if they cheated with you while with someone else. Not necessarily that they will do it again, maybe you just swept her off her feet, and that's it. The problem is the insecurity. Knowing what she (or he for that matter) did with you, you'd get jealous anytime she was with another guy. Or if stuff started reminding you off her past relationship... it would just be a lot to handle.
2. This is tough, I won't answer it. There are shades of gray. It depends on age and how close you are to eachother in a relationship. So let's say it's early, there are rocky times, that kind of stuff. That's possible to get over. If it's a close relationship, and there is cheating, particularly romantic cheating, then I say it's over. You can't do that stuff. Marriage... I suppose with counseling and stuff, anything is possible to get over for the sake of salvaging what normally is a good marriage. If the marriage sucked anyway, it should be over. I know I'm making statements like it should be set in stone, but I'm just saying my personal thoughts about how I'd feel in the situation, or what I think might be best. I personally think infidelity is just straight up wrong, and I myself wouldn't tolerate it. I wouldn't do it either, guys may be horny, but there is plenty of self control. I think I feel this way mostly because I cheated with my friend's girlfriend when I was 14... he's no longer a friend, she is a nutcase that I should have never gotten involved with in the first place, and that's sorta put things into perspective. And for guys... I don't necessarily think once a cheater, always a cheater. Though there is self control, sometimes hormones can get the better of a weak man. But the experience can make him stronger and change his ways. Then again, some guys are completely habitual and don't even care (they are known as dickheads). Women, it's kinda hard to tell. I'd say because it's more rare for a woman to cheat, that one that does is probably habitual. Then again, if there is a guy who is really charming and comforting, and her boyfriend or whatever has been an a-hole recently, it can be a one time thing.
3. Once again, shades of gray. But I'd say 90% of the time, bad idea to go out with someone in a serious relationship if they cheated with you while with someone else. Not necessarily that they will do it again, maybe you just swept her off her feet, and that's it. The problem is the insecurity. Knowing what she (or he for that matter) did with you, you'd get jealous anytime she was with another guy. Or if stuff started reminding you off her past relationship... it would just be a lot to handle.