07-14-2003, 08:24 AM
here is my perspective why im off drugs:
i havent put a mind altering substance in my body for 2 years and 2 months or so.. i started gettin high when i was 10 1/2, stopped when i was 14.. i know when i started doing drugs/drinkin, it was great. the feeling good meter was at a high and the feelin bad meter was at an all time low.. but as i pergressed.. pot was gettin kind of boring.. then i started to smoke opium.. after that, i started to speed a lot(heh doctor gave me aderal*or how ever its spelled*).. then started to huff dustoff(computer cleaner).. i did a little acid.. then got into coke.. now, at this point, i was doin just about all these different kinds of drug at the same time period.. just finding something that i could get a quik fix on my sadness and the gross feeling of being me. i ended up going to rehab for 7 weeks and decided to try and stay sober.. so i started going to a sobriety group... u know what? i dont have to feel that gross feeling of being a complete peice of shit.. because im not a peice of shit.. not to me or anyone else.. (now not everyone is perfect) but ultimatley what im trying to say is that i feel 1000x better than i did 2 years ago.
Im not saying that this will happen to everyone.. but most likey if you keep doin drugs you will get into bigger and badder things.. and you wont feel good unless u have those quik fixes, if you arent dead by then... so far ive found out that 3 of the people i used to get high with almost every day have been killed or killed themselves. i have known many people who have hurt themselves from that gross feeling of being in their own skin.. ive known many people who have eaten so much acid, that they havent come back yet.. my point is.. i am physicaly healthy, mentaly healthy, and spiritualy healthy.. and i feel good when i go to sleep at night.
Now dont get me wrong.. if i could handle drinkin a beer and not goin back fer the whole case.. i would drink. If i could do drugs and not screw up every little thing in my life.. i would be gettin high.. but thats not reality.. reality is, im a drug addict.
-AnTiX
-Powered By GOD
i havent put a mind altering substance in my body for 2 years and 2 months or so.. i started gettin high when i was 10 1/2, stopped when i was 14.. i know when i started doing drugs/drinkin, it was great. the feeling good meter was at a high and the feelin bad meter was at an all time low.. but as i pergressed.. pot was gettin kind of boring.. then i started to smoke opium.. after that, i started to speed a lot(heh doctor gave me aderal*or how ever its spelled*).. then started to huff dustoff(computer cleaner).. i did a little acid.. then got into coke.. now, at this point, i was doin just about all these different kinds of drug at the same time period.. just finding something that i could get a quik fix on my sadness and the gross feeling of being me. i ended up going to rehab for 7 weeks and decided to try and stay sober.. so i started going to a sobriety group... u know what? i dont have to feel that gross feeling of being a complete peice of shit.. because im not a peice of shit.. not to me or anyone else.. (now not everyone is perfect) but ultimatley what im trying to say is that i feel 1000x better than i did 2 years ago.
Im not saying that this will happen to everyone.. but most likey if you keep doin drugs you will get into bigger and badder things.. and you wont feel good unless u have those quik fixes, if you arent dead by then... so far ive found out that 3 of the people i used to get high with almost every day have been killed or killed themselves. i have known many people who have hurt themselves from that gross feeling of being in their own skin.. ive known many people who have eaten so much acid, that they havent come back yet.. my point is.. i am physicaly healthy, mentaly healthy, and spiritualy healthy.. and i feel good when i go to sleep at night.
Now dont get me wrong.. if i could handle drinkin a beer and not goin back fer the whole case.. i would drink. If i could do drugs and not screw up every little thing in my life.. i would be gettin high.. but thats not reality.. reality is, im a drug addict.
-AnTiX
-Powered By GOD